Monday, May 5, 2008

Abby, carseats, stretch marks and that ho Jamie Lynnn Spears

I have gotten into the habit of reading my previous posts before I write the new one. The last one I wrote always makes me tear up a bit when I read it. This is a new post, and likely not to cause any sort of water-works.

This past weekend was the baby shower for Parker. On the way there Josh had made the comment that this was my day. Interesting because never in a million years did I think of it as my day. That day was about Parker, as most days will be in the very near future...actually they have all centered around him since October 2007. Anyway, it was a great day and I really appreciate everything everyone did to be a part of it and all the awesome things Parker got.

We set up the Pack and Play in the living room and Abby, our dog (see photo below), is very sceptical of it. I would not say afraid, but she glares at it when she walks by. We also put all of Parker's things in what will be his room, which is current Abby's favorite room. She refuses to give up the room without a fight. She goes in there, sniffs around and perches herself on top of an old toy chest. Not the queen-size bed, but the toy chest. For those of you who have not had the distinct pleasure of meeting Ms. Abby, she is not at all territorial. I could very easily take a treat right out of her mouth and she would just go sit on the couch. The point being she would have no reaction. She is kind of handling this baby thing that same way. She is just confused about where all this stuff came from. She is super sweet though and at night when I am laying in bed she puts her paw on my stomach or curls up right against me. The only concern I have regarding Abby and Parker is that Josh and I called Abby our goat. She looks very goat-like to us. We are concerned that when it comes time for Parker to learn about animals he will struggle with the difference between an Abby-goat and an actual goat. Eh, it's all semantics anyway...

After we got everything into the house on Sunday, I realized some of the items were going to have to be dealt with right way and others could wait a bit longer. For some reason I deemed the car seat as something that needs to be dealt with right away, quickly and now.
We got it out of the box ok. Thankfully for Josh, and the neighborhood children, the seat was already assembled. Josh has a habit of cussing worse than me (!) when he is putting stuff together. Despite adverting this potential catastrophe, we still have not quite figured out the car seat.
I can say it is in my car.
However, I cannot guarantee that if Parker, or any baby, were in the seat that they would not be ejected out of the seat and through the back window, if I say, slammed on the brakes or am involved in some sort of fender bender, God forbid something more severe happen. It is not exactly secure at the moment. Apparently I have about 66-ish days to work this issue out...I have little confidence.

At night Parker likes to move around a lot. I can see my stomach move, but I cannot (thankfully) identify body parts. It looks kind of like what I would imagine it would look like to be inside a conga drum or something. Anyway, at night I usually sit on the couch with my shirt up over my belly...nothing X-rated people, only the belly is showing. I do this because it is just so cool seeing him be-bopping around in there. The other night I must have been wearing my shorts low too because Josh looks over in horror and said, "Oh my God are you ok? Did you cut yourself or something?!" No.
No dear.
I did not cut myself.
I...I have...stretchmarks.

Enough on that...

Jamie Lynn Spears is a ho. First the little witch gets pregnant right around the same time as me. In fact, I think we have very similar due dates.
She is having a boy too*, I'm not sure of the name she is planning on, but it's probably Parker or something close. *{correction: On Thursday night I read she is likely having a girl. Who cares, she is still a ho}
I read somewhere that she is not concerned about weight gain because she is young and knows she will bounce back. PUH-LEEZE. We have all seen what your gene pool does to a Spears post-pregnancy. Good luck sweetheart!
As if all that wasn't enough, this little Britney in training also had her baby shower this past weekend. Can I do ANYTHING without her copying me!? The article I read said "She open all of her gifts." Like this is a great feat of some sort. Like most of us non-Hollywood moms-to-be glare at these strangely wrapped boxes and marvel at how difficult it is going to be to get the actually object out of said box. Thank God JLS is here to guide us all.
I do have to say, I bet she did not have grown men chugging beer out of baby bottles for a lottery scratch-off. Game, set, match JLS. Game, set, match indeed!

Pictures, as pormised!