Tuesday, July 27, 2010


You know those burning questions that seem to have no answer? Well, grab your favorite burn related ointment and your bifocals because I am about to answer a few of them.

You're welcome.

How many CDs will fit into the single CD player in a stardard Hyundai Santa Fe?

Yesterday Pman was playing his favorite game- Beep Beep, which involves him sitting in my parked car in the driveway with the emergency brake firmly in place. He pushes every button, turns every knob, and honks the horn repeatedly. It's ...great...

It seems he found the CD player, which is meant to house 1 CD at a time.  He inserted at least 5 CDs. I'm not sure exactly how many are in the player at the moment. The car refuses to eject anymore and will yell curse words at me every time I push the CD button. Guess that minivan is coming sooner than I thought.

What happens with a toddler needs to "check" his email?

You will lose a back slash key and for reasons you will never know or understand, your B button will stick, rendering it extremely difficult to log into anything since there seems to be a B in every password you ever created.

When do chocolate and peanut butter NOT work well together?

When the recipe comes from a child’s cookbook and involves powdered milk. Also the few people I allowed to tasted these Balls of Awful ,all guessed there was coconut in them.  There was no coconut.

When you spend $30 on a reversible Batman/Superman cap for your son, who will end up wearing it?

Your husband

If your husband uses spray sunscreen in a careless fashion and ends up with a terrible sunburn, what household item will he reach for first to scratch his back?

There are actually several answers, you are not going to like any of them:
• YOUR hairbrush
• Son's toys
• Any doorframe on the inside or outside of the house
• A spatula
• One of those noodle grabber things you use to pull wet noodles out of water. He will also make groaning noises with this one.

MMMBBaazzzFFArrrrbbbbmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm- What is this the sound of?

Bubble solution leaking into the motor of a bubble blowing toy rendering me helpless and P profoundly upset.

When a high strung college freshman is asked to write a 300-500 word short (SHORT) essay that WILL NOT be graded about something she is good at or enjoys doing, how will she react?

She will cry and leave the room in a huff.

Finally, what's for dinner?

No really, what? PLEASE don't say chicken again. I don't care if you put all the curry powder in Indian /BBQ sauce/gravy on a boneless skinless chicken breast, it will still- taste- like- chicken.


Nancy C said...

You have written some funny stuff, but this one just slayed me. The cape, the scratching...Josh just writes your blog for you.

Mikaela said...

This one killed me!

ModernMom said...

LOL Oh I am sorry, but there is some funny here! Balls of awful. Been there done that..mine were Muffins of flatness.

Hope tomorrow is better!