Pregnancy: Baby gear and you

Now that we officially know we are having a boy, we have been registering for some baby items. This is a very hard thing to do online, especially for a girl who is new at this. I have been looking on babiesrus.com and reading reviews of everything from breast pumps* (more on this in a minute) to strollers to baby holsters...that is what I call them, but I mean those things you carry babies around in that seem like backpacks, not a sling, but...well a holster.

Some people feel very strongly about these items. I am not kidding, one lady wrote enough to fill up the entire page of a Word document stating her feelings about a Pack N Play!

I figured if Josh and I went to the store together, we may have more luck picking out the larger items (car seat, stroller, holster, highchair etc.) That was not an entirely incorrect idea. The one flaw was bringing Josh. After about his 10th lap around the babies r us store with the Jeep jogger stroller, I finally gave up trying to get his opinion. This notion was solidified when he said, "I don't understand this baby toy." Josh is a smart guy, but apparently, easily distracted and occasionally outsmarted by 5 piece puzzles.

Did I mention that this was actually our 2nd attempt at going to a babies r us? The first one was in Waldorf. If you do not know Waldorf let me sum it by saying, you should not go there unless you are packing heat, which we weren't. However, ever since I became pregnant I kind of feel indestructible or something. Anyway, we go into the baby section and wait for someone to come help us. We waited for about 20 minutes and no one ever came back to give us the gun thing to do the registry, despite the fact that we told about 3 people that is what we were there for.
Finally, when my blood had irrationally reached it's boiling point over this "intense" waiting period I decided the wait was over and it was time to raise a little hell. As we were walking out, I went to customer service desk and said, "Whoever works in the baby section, should be fired." I did not know it at the time, but I said it to the girl who actually is suppose to be in the baby section. As we were walking out of the store someone said, "Did she come back to help you?" I said in a loud voice, no not shouting, just loudly, "No! No she didn't!" We promptly left. As Josh put it, don't mess with a pregnant lady on a mission.

I will close with Josh's discovery of the breast pump.
Josh made a comment that since I will only be pregnant for a few more months, I would be able to enjoy a beer with him this summer. After a second or two he said, "Wait, will you be able to drink if you are breastfeeding?" I said, "Yes, I will just pump and dump."

*Josh stares at me blankly*

"I will drink a beer, pump out the milk, dump it and then I will be able to feed the baby alcohol-free milk."

*Josh stares at me blankly*

"Do you not know what I mean by pump?"

*Josh stares at me blankly*

"There is a thing you can buy that pumps milk out, so you, the father of the baby, can help in the feedings. I hook it up to my.."

Josh interrupts, "That's a enough!! I don't need to know!!! Just drink the beer and do what you have to do!"