Sunday, June 29, 2008

Small milestones to some

I want to thank everyone who responded to the email and is reading this blog.
Parker has been put on a lot of prayer lists and we really appreciate that.

I continue to visit him everyday. I am not allowed to drive because of the c-section, but my my mom has stayed in Calvert County and takes me up and back every day. She is amazing. Being a mom myself, now I completely understand how someone can be so selfless especially when their baby is hurting. I need to sit by Parker side for about 4 to 5 hours everyday and just hold his hand. I would love to do it more, but after 4 to 5 hours I am drained and end up spending the rest of my night crying off and on.

Since the last post we have had some milestones which may seem small to most, but are the world to us.

We have a surgery date of July 1 pretty much nailed down, but we do not have the time yet. They keep reminding us that Hopkins is a trauma center and if a "more serious" case comes up, Parker will get bumped. They also tell us this is good news because if he is bumpable then he is stable. I know what they are saying, but somehow, I fail to see that as ok.

Parker was Baptised today. We only did this because it is something we wanted to do anyway and after all we have been through up to this point, we took advantage of a service the hospital provided. We did not do this because of some dark reason related to him having surgery. They do tell us that he is strong and should pull through surgery just fine.

For the first time today my son opened his eyes.
He has been trying like hell to do this for two days and today it finally happened. It was only in little spurts and his eyes were not all the way open, but for a few seconds we could look at each other. It was almost heaven. I say almost, because there is only one thing that could top that and that one thing also occured today.

I got to hold my son for the first time today.
It was amazing.
We sat there for...forever and he just fell esleep in my arms. I wished so bad that we were home so that I could sleep with him.

We have no idea how long after surgery he will have to wait before he comes home. I do know that they want to start giving him the milk I leave there for him asap via the tube that us in his stomach. Once they see he can process it ok, they will remove that tube and start feeding him normally. He has a ventalator in as well so before he can eat for real, that needs to be removed, but he is on the lowest setting right now and we are hoping the levels do not change post surgery.

There are a few more very sad things that I do not want to write about because I do not want to document them.

I saw my baby's eyes and held him today, that is what I want to remember.

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