Isn't this putting the cart slightly before the horse?

I am currently 37 weeks pregnant.
Last week when I went to the doctor, Parker was measuring right where he should be (we were both at 36 weeks). In fact on the growth chart I was shown he was dead center average size for a 36 week baby.
I went today, a week and 2 days later, and somehow my son has managed to surpass me by about 2 weeks.

I have been pregnant for 37 weeks, but I now have a 39 week old baby in my tummy. This means that Parker hit another growth spurt. I also gained 4 pounds in one week (all him) and I have been working out like mad trying to get myself to dilate some more...no luck!

Great.

How exciting for me.

However, I did find out that I am positive for Strep B. It is a fairly common thing and nothing to worry about really. It just means that there is a virus in the birth canal and when my water breaks (hopefully within the next hour or so...HA!) I will have to be given an antibiotic to ensure Parker does not catch this infection on his way out.
Another however, my doctor also informed me that I am "narrow" and would probably have trouble passing a 10 pound baby. Therefore, I would probably need a c-section should he get that big. Well, reread the beginning of this particular blog and you will see that I may very well be on my way to a 10 pounder! This means that Strep B thing may be an even smaller/non issue, but I will still get the antibiotic when my water breaks just in case.

When my doctor told me that he was measuring at 39 weeks I said, "Ok great! Next week works for me, let's get him out!"

My doctor just laughed.

I informed her I was being serious and that I am ready. This is no laughing matter.

She called me crazy and laughed again.

I'm guessing this means that the only way Parker will come next week is if I am able to shake him out myself, and believe me I am trying.

As I was leaving the office, the receptionist said, "Just walk a lot and have sex."
She whispered the "and have sex" part. Like that is something taboo, having sex--with your husband. Clearly that is how I got in this predicament! (and it may hold the key to get me out of it-- lucky, or not so lucky, Josh!)

Don't get me wrong. I do love being pregnant. However, something changes in your last few weeks of pregnancy, at least it has for me.

I'm tired of having to hoist myself out of cars and the couch while making a grunting noise. It is nearly impossible for me to go from a sitting to standing position without sounding like I am trying to pass a boulder through my rectum.

I'm tired of people commenting on my pregnancy and it's relation to the heat. First of all 100 degrees is hot, pregnant or not. Second, do you think commenting on it makes it better? Well it does not, so shut up and bring me some ice water damn it!

I'm also really getting weirded out by the fact that I have an actual person inside me. Before when he was just a faceless tad pole, I liked that I was protecting him and helping him grow. Well he is now identifiable as a baby and he can survive outside of me, so let's do it already!

I still have to do his laundry and get his crib together. These are all things I plan on doing over the weekend, then any thing goes.

Let's get the show on the road already, sheesh!