Puking (Squared)

I'm better. I think I can say with full confidence that I am on solid foods again.


On Wednesday afternoon as I was complicating whether or not to go to the gym, I decided no because I was feeling off. Instead of gyming it, I sat on the couch and watched Pfunk squeal as he ran circles around the room/house (really it is that small).

Then, I felt it.

The unmistakable- thick tongue, extra saliva, building pressure from the belly area- I was about to puke. I was holding Parker's sippy cup, so I threw it in his general direction and ran to the half bathroom. P followed me and at first heave he was terrified.

I was kneeling on the ground, face in toilet, retching and convulsing up my Bob Evans spinach salad (never again!) and trying to reassure SweetP that, "Mommy is ok. It's ok." Weak smile.

I was doing this so much that he started imitating me between hurls. He would stick his little face in the toilet and go, "BWWWAAAAAHHHH" and then laugh. Hysterically.

When I was able to actually pick my head up, I called Josh told him the events of the day. Like a wonderful husband he took my illness as an excuse to come home early and take off the next day. I say this in jest, but really he was so great about all of this.

From 4p.m. to 9:30p.m. I threw up 9 times. After about the second session, my belly really needed to send the message to my head that there was no need to continue with the vomiting portion of the flu as there was NOTHING IN MY STOMACH ANYMORE!

Four days before our wedding- almost 3 and a half years ago- I had food poisoning. I burst several blood vessels in my eyes expelling the bad salmon from my system. This flu was worse than that.

Around 11p.m. Parker started crying.

Uh-oh.

On the monitor it sounded like a cough and then a horrifying scream. Even in my weakened condition I knew what it was. I had my cell phone with me, so from my bedroom, I called Josh who was in the living room and told him to meet me in P's room.

I picked up P as Josh stripped the sheets. As Josh was trying to get everything cleaned up and reset, P and I sat down in the rocking chair- I pass out as in faint and Psizzle toss his cookies again.

We were a mess.

Alls well now. Josh eventually caught our bug, not surprisingly, but we are on the mend.

It was terrible, but we survived our first trip down the Family Flu Row- a milestone. A gross milestone, but a milestone nonetheless.

On the bright side, I am well within my target weight range! Josh assures me this is not something to be proud of since I achieved it by spewing everything I had eaten in the last week. Oh well. Too bad it's not bathing suit season.