What's a Momsuit?
Before I explain my new vocab word, let me first take you through the journey that begins with my sister's sister.
Yes, you read that correctly. The focus of this back story is my older sister's older sister. Trust me that is the uncomplicated way of explaining this complicated relationship. The lady is not my own sister. I got to know her very well though when I was pregnant. She was in my arsenal of veteran moms I called on whenever I had a panic attack about oh well anything- vaccines, nursing pads, car seats, potty training (yes when I was pregnant I worried about potty training- a challenge I still have not had to face.)
During one of our conversations, my sister's sister told me a story that HORRIFIED me. It seems she was at a company pool party, for the company that employed her HUSBAND. In other words, she really did not know these people. She was bobbing in the pool with her then baby and talking to her husband and one of his co-workers, maybe it was even his boss, as they stood outside the pool.
Then she felt it.
Her daughter had pulled down the top of my sister's sister's bathing suit.
She had successfully and unintentionally flashed anyone who happened to be glaceing over at the moment.
Nice.
Momsuit: (noun) 1. A bathing suit that covers all areas of a woman's body that have been effectively stretched to ungodly limits after carrying a fetus for 9 months 2. Bathing suit that is sturdy enough to withstand pulling and grabbing from the baby or child 3. Does not look like something Rue Maclanahan or Bea Arthur would have worn on a scandalous episode of Golden Girls- it a momsuit not a grandmasuit.
Today I purchased my first post-pregnancy bathing suit. It does not have a turtle neck nor does it go all the way to my ankles ala wetsuit style. The momsuit does not have a skirt or a floral pattern, neither of which are successful in disguising any problem areas by the way. In fact, both the skirted and the floral patterned suits only draw attention to those ample areas you are trying to disguise. Just an FYI from me to you.
I was nervous about this shopping trip mostly because I have developed a new approach to bathing suits. I am a mom and I am almost 30. I feel that I am passed the point of full mid-drift bearing bikinis. I don't judge if you are an over 30 mom of 2 who happens to wear bikini's, I am just not one. However, I have not worn a one piece in years and do not have fond memories of them. I usually end up having to hunch over- not a good look from any angle. If on the off chance I can stand up straight, my boobs end up looking like two flat pancakes with chocolate chips in the middle. Not cute.
Instead, my momsuit is something that would not embarrass anyone- me, Josh or Parker. It is a bright blue tankini. Now, usually I hate tankini's because they squeeze in on my tummy aka my problem area. Finally, after I trying on every, I mean EVERY one they had in the store. Each one in 2 different sizes. I found one I liked.
Liked, not loved. And purchased it.
A small slice of my middle peeks through, but the sales girl assured me that it peeked out, not hung out- BIG difference!
In the privacy of the dressing room I tightened the gold clasps on the straps as much as comfortably possible, bend over and yanked on it, Parker style.
Glory of glories, no flashing!! I told the sales girl I needed something sturdy and that is what I got.
Beach vaca? Bring it.
Pool side with the Pman? You don't scare me.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
Busted Leg and Parker-free
After two doctors visits, one MRI, one MRA and two leg braces we have been told Josh will likely need 2 surgeries to fix his knee. From what they can tell at this point Josh almost completely dislocated his knee cap and the doctor, who is like a miniature version of Sylvester Stallone, keeps calling this a significant injury. All the stuff (muscles? tendons? ligaments?) on the outside of his knee are torn and there is likely damage to the interior part of his knee as well. We will not really know about the interior part until the first surgery is performed. The goal of surgery #1 is to repair (or begin to repair) the outside of the knee and assess the damage to the inside. This surgery is scheduled to take place on April 16. The second surgery will be about 2 to 3 months after that.
Some people have asked how this happened exactly and it is a bit unclear. What I have gathered is during a game Josh had the ball and was tackled. His feet stayed in the muddy ground, while his legs went in another direction, causing the tear. Did I mention the guy who tackled Josh was likely a lot younger than him? Did I mention the guy who tackled Josh was a rookie player? How about the fact that this guy played for a military team based out of Quantico making him a rugby playing Marine?
Yeh, well...
Despite his injury, Josh was adamant about us needing to get away for the weekend. I think he could really just see that I was about to have some sort of break down and needed to come up for air.
We had plans to go see my older sister this past weekend, but once Josh hurt himself, we called off that trip as it would require a 9 hour car ride. When I called it off my mom and dad, who were scheduled to watch Parker all weekend, said "Um, well we still want Parker this weekend."
With their encouragement and Josh's ...yes Josh's planning we decided to go to the Northern Virginia area and stay at a bed and breakfast and hit some wineries. I was honestly concerned about going to wineries with gimpy. I did not think it was the best idea for him to be getting in and out of a car with his FULL leg (I'm talking groin to ankle) removable Velcro cast thing. He assured me he would be ok and if all else fails he at least had the prescription pain killers. Is anyone else worried just reading that? We are going on a trip specifically to drink wine and Josh comes equipped with a "pocket full of fun."
I did the Great American Parker and Abby Trade with my mom on Thursday afternoon. The plan was Josh and I would get up Friday morning, go to a doctor's appointment and then head to the winery, aiming to get there around 3 or so.
HA!
The morning doctor's appointment led to an afternoon *MRA. Josh was authorized to get handicapped tags for his car, oh yes, despite the FULL leg cast, he is allowed to drive. A stick.
Those of you who live from North Beach to mid-St. Mary's County may want to watch out for a silver VW Jetta. After the am doctor's appointment we attempted to get the handicapped tags, but the MVA was closed. It was 11a.m. on Friday. Closed.
Neat.
Finally, after a crazy game of phone tag with the first and second doctor's offices, a terrible lunch at Red Hot and Blue, and an MRA at the DIRTIEST doctor's office I have ever been in, we were on our way. We got to the b&b at 8:30ish causing us to miss check in by about 2 hours, but they let us come in anyway.
When it was all said and done, Josh did a great job of doing the wine tour thing on crutches. We had a great weekend at a quiet, historic b&b. Whenever Josh and I need to just get away for a weekend we usually go to the Northern Virginia area and do the b&b- wine tour thing. It is very relaxing and not far from home. On this trip we did not have any particularly good wines or any food worth mentioning, but the company was great and the break was much needed. Oh and I made a neat necklace at a little bead place on Saturday morning.
Just so you do not think I completely forgot about my little monkey, I will say he had a great weekend at my parents probably eating cotton candy for dinner and dog food for dessert.
The best news of the weekend: Parker's first bottom tooth FINALLY...FINALLY broke through. However, he is very protective of it and will only show it if you can get him to giggle. Hint on getting him to giggle- he is INSANELY ticklish.
*Oh and what's an MRA you ask? Don't worry the doctor's secretary did know either. Reassuring, no? It is when they inject a dye to see the blood flow.
Some people have asked how this happened exactly and it is a bit unclear. What I have gathered is during a game Josh had the ball and was tackled. His feet stayed in the muddy ground, while his legs went in another direction, causing the tear. Did I mention the guy who tackled Josh was likely a lot younger than him? Did I mention the guy who tackled Josh was a rookie player? How about the fact that this guy played for a military team based out of Quantico making him a rugby playing Marine?
Yeh, well...
Despite his injury, Josh was adamant about us needing to get away for the weekend. I think he could really just see that I was about to have some sort of break down and needed to come up for air.
We had plans to go see my older sister this past weekend, but once Josh hurt himself, we called off that trip as it would require a 9 hour car ride. When I called it off my mom and dad, who were scheduled to watch Parker all weekend, said "Um, well we still want Parker this weekend."
With their encouragement and Josh's ...yes Josh's planning we decided to go to the Northern Virginia area and stay at a bed and breakfast and hit some wineries. I was honestly concerned about going to wineries with gimpy. I did not think it was the best idea for him to be getting in and out of a car with his FULL leg (I'm talking groin to ankle) removable Velcro cast thing. He assured me he would be ok and if all else fails he at least had the prescription pain killers. Is anyone else worried just reading that? We are going on a trip specifically to drink wine and Josh comes equipped with a "pocket full of fun."
I did the Great American Parker and Abby Trade with my mom on Thursday afternoon. The plan was Josh and I would get up Friday morning, go to a doctor's appointment and then head to the winery, aiming to get there around 3 or so.
HA!
The morning doctor's appointment led to an afternoon *MRA. Josh was authorized to get handicapped tags for his car, oh yes, despite the FULL leg cast, he is allowed to drive. A stick.
Those of you who live from North Beach to mid-St. Mary's County may want to watch out for a silver VW Jetta. After the am doctor's appointment we attempted to get the handicapped tags, but the MVA was closed. It was 11a.m. on Friday. Closed.
Neat.
Finally, after a crazy game of phone tag with the first and second doctor's offices, a terrible lunch at Red Hot and Blue, and an MRA at the DIRTIEST doctor's office I have ever been in, we were on our way. We got to the b&b at 8:30ish causing us to miss check in by about 2 hours, but they let us come in anyway.
When it was all said and done, Josh did a great job of doing the wine tour thing on crutches. We had a great weekend at a quiet, historic b&b. Whenever Josh and I need to just get away for a weekend we usually go to the Northern Virginia area and do the b&b- wine tour thing. It is very relaxing and not far from home. On this trip we did not have any particularly good wines or any food worth mentioning, but the company was great and the break was much needed. Oh and I made a neat necklace at a little bead place on Saturday morning.
Just so you do not think I completely forgot about my little monkey, I will say he had a great weekend at my parents probably eating cotton candy for dinner and dog food for dessert.
The best news of the weekend: Parker's first bottom tooth FINALLY...FINALLY broke through. However, he is very protective of it and will only show it if you can get him to giggle. Hint on getting him to giggle- he is INSANELY ticklish.
*Oh and what's an MRA you ask? Don't worry the doctor's secretary did know either. Reassuring, no? It is when they inject a dye to see the blood flow.
Monday, March 30, 2009
He Ain't No Lucky Charm (UPDATED)
On Saturday Josh had a rugby game in Virginia. When the games are that far away I do not go. Actually, I only go to the games if they are home games and the weather is perfect and I have NOTHING else to do.
In other words, I rarely go to these games.
But this is not about me. Who am I kidding, it's all about me.
Let's back up a bit- Josh was slated to go away for work this week from Monday through Thursday and then we were suppose to go see my sister, Megan sans Pmoney. Since Josh was going to be gone and Parker has a new found love for cupcakes I decided for make some for our upcoming Mommy and P-rock's quality time.
On Saturday afternoon, I was baking cupcakes and when I was half way through the phone rings and it's Josh. It was only 2 in the afternoon, which should have been the middle of the game, so this was odd. I answer and a very drugged up Josh was on the other end. It was hard to make out exactly what he was saying, but I could decipher that he was in the hospital and that one, possibly both, of his legs were in bad shape. Apparently he was tackled or something and his feet stayed in the muddy ground, but his legs went in another direction.
While he was in the hospital he was told not to eat or drink anything in case they had to do emergency surgery. After I got off the phone with him, I put the last batch of cupcakes in the oven- don't think I'm heartless, but what was I going to with a bowl of raw cake dough?
Then, I started lining up people to watch Pman and packing a bag for what I was sure was going to be an overnight hospital stay- in a hospital 2 hours from home.
After a lot of back and forth phone calls between me and a now profoundly drugged up Josh it was determined his left leg is ok. His right leg is jacked up, but not broken. We are now waiting for an appointment to get an MRI to see the extent of the damage.
At one point on Saturday night when he got home, at nearly 11, I asked him if I would have to help him out if he had a BM. He said he thought he could handle it. This was much to my relief, because as I told him, I love him and will help him out as much as I can, but I'm not sure our marriage is at that point yet.
Josh is on 3 different meds right now and between him and Parker, I'm not sure who is more difficult to care for. I say that, but actually Josh is doing a good job of trying to be as independent as possible. At one point yesterday I was taking out the trash, (a job usually reserved for Josh...) and Parker was crawling around while Josh was on the couch. Pfunk started heading toward Abby's food and all Josh could do was say, "No Parker." As if he knew Josh did not have a prayer in catching him, Parker gave a half smile and kept rolling toward the food.
As far as our trip sans Pman, that may be postponed. We will not know until we see the MRI. Also, as you will recall, back in the end of January/beginning of February Josh got in a car accident and totalled his car. After a LOOOONNNGG insane search we ended up buying him a VW Jetta- manual. I do not know how to drive a manual. My car is higher off the ground and probably would be easier for him to drive. However, if he takes my car, I'm totally stuck. We are in quite a pickle.
So after spending the ENTIRE day in the Santa Fe driving up and down the long boring road that is Route 4, we found out Josh will need surgery on his knee. The doctor even commented that this is one of the worst, if not the worst wiggly knee issue he has ever seen. Of course it is.
For anyone not paying attention here is how 2009 has been going for the Phillips family- well mainly Josh:
January: Josh totalled his car
February: Parker kicked out Josh's tooth
March: Josh blows out his knee
See a pattern?
While out we did go to a Thai place for lunch where Parker was showered with attention because of his sheer cuteness, which always make me feel a bit better. Don't get me wrong, I'm not mad at Josh for getting hurt, accidents happen. But how did I become a single mother of 2 in the matter of 1 weekend?
In other words, I rarely go to these games.
But this is not about me. Who am I kidding, it's all about me.
Let's back up a bit- Josh was slated to go away for work this week from Monday through Thursday and then we were suppose to go see my sister, Megan sans Pmoney. Since Josh was going to be gone and Parker has a new found love for cupcakes I decided for make some for our upcoming Mommy and P-rock's quality time.
On Saturday afternoon, I was baking cupcakes and when I was half way through the phone rings and it's Josh. It was only 2 in the afternoon, which should have been the middle of the game, so this was odd. I answer and a very drugged up Josh was on the other end. It was hard to make out exactly what he was saying, but I could decipher that he was in the hospital and that one, possibly both, of his legs were in bad shape. Apparently he was tackled or something and his feet stayed in the muddy ground, but his legs went in another direction.
While he was in the hospital he was told not to eat or drink anything in case they had to do emergency surgery. After I got off the phone with him, I put the last batch of cupcakes in the oven- don't think I'm heartless, but what was I going to with a bowl of raw cake dough?
Then, I started lining up people to watch Pman and packing a bag for what I was sure was going to be an overnight hospital stay- in a hospital 2 hours from home.
After a lot of back and forth phone calls between me and a now profoundly drugged up Josh it was determined his left leg is ok. His right leg is jacked up, but not broken. We are now waiting for an appointment to get an MRI to see the extent of the damage.
At one point on Saturday night when he got home, at nearly 11, I asked him if I would have to help him out if he had a BM. He said he thought he could handle it. This was much to my relief, because as I told him, I love him and will help him out as much as I can, but I'm not sure our marriage is at that point yet.
Josh is on 3 different meds right now and between him and Parker, I'm not sure who is more difficult to care for. I say that, but actually Josh is doing a good job of trying to be as independent as possible. At one point yesterday I was taking out the trash, (a job usually reserved for Josh...) and Parker was crawling around while Josh was on the couch. Pfunk started heading toward Abby's food and all Josh could do was say, "No Parker." As if he knew Josh did not have a prayer in catching him, Parker gave a half smile and kept rolling toward the food.
As far as our trip sans Pman, that may be postponed. We will not know until we see the MRI. Also, as you will recall, back in the end of January/beginning of February Josh got in a car accident and totalled his car. After a LOOOONNNGG insane search we ended up buying him a VW Jetta- manual. I do not know how to drive a manual. My car is higher off the ground and probably would be easier for him to drive. However, if he takes my car, I'm totally stuck. We are in quite a pickle.
So after spending the ENTIRE day in the Santa Fe driving up and down the long boring road that is Route 4, we found out Josh will need surgery on his knee. The doctor even commented that this is one of the worst, if not the worst wiggly knee issue he has ever seen. Of course it is.
For anyone not paying attention here is how 2009 has been going for the Phillips family- well mainly Josh:
January: Josh totalled his car
February: Parker kicked out Josh's tooth
March: Josh blows out his knee
See a pattern?
While out we did go to a Thai place for lunch where Parker was showered with attention because of his sheer cuteness, which always make me feel a bit better. Don't get me wrong, I'm not mad at Josh for getting hurt, accidents happen. But how did I become a single mother of 2 in the matter of 1 weekend?
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
It's a Sickness
Confession: I may have to change the name of my blog to Confessions of an Obsession, which will chronicle a nearly 30 year old, married mother's sick obsession with New Kids on the Block.
Confession: I have listened to the CD so much that Parker now turns his head around in his rear facing carseat so that he can give me a look that says, "Really mom? Again?" Honestly though, the new cd The Block is pretty good. Although, when I played pieces of the best parts for Josh, he replied, "Nikki. This isn't even funny. It's not even so bad it's funny. It's just SO bad." Despite my desperate encouraging and futile attempts to convince him otherwise, Josh is not/never will be a fan. Sorry guys, I tried.
Confession: On Saturday, 2 days after the concert, I downloaded some...well maybe not some. The word some implies a small number whereas I currently have 10 NKOTB songs on my ipod, so more than some. After the songs were safely and securely on my ipod, I told Josh I needed to go workout. It was 4:15 meaning I got to the gym at 4:30 and it closes at 5:00. I didn't care. I NEEDED to hear these songs. Please understand this is a need.
While at the gym Parker, who is the intended focus for this blog, pulls himself up on, well anything. Or anyone I guess. It seems he tried to pull himself up on a little boy at the gym named Hunter, who is probably six months to a year old than Parker. These boys have a love hate relationship. When Pfunk was a wee-funk and went to the gym in the carrier, Hunter used to lift the canopy thing* and sweetly touch Parker's fuzzy hair and then pull the canopy thing back down. It was very cute.
About a week ago when we got to the gym, I sat Parker down and Hunter came over and patted Parker's head sweetly and then started grabbing his face. Parker sat there with this "What the hell..." look on his face. I just said, "Oh no Hunter, be nice to Parker." Hunter stopped and they were back to being buddies.
A day or so later I came into the gym after a great workout (with NKOTB) and was getting my little monkey ready to leave. Then I realized one of the day care girls was talking to Hunter's mom and saying that he had a good day, but that he kicked someone. My ears perked up and I asked, "Are you talking about Parker?" and the day care girl replied, "Yeh, but it was no big thing and Parker did not even cry."
Nice.
She is NOT someone I would ask to babysit Pman for money.
P.S. I did tell her supervisor that while I realize this sort of thing happens, I also expect to be told when my son gets kicked.
*I'm not really sure if canopy thing is right, but when I asked Josh what that thing is called that you pull up on the baby carrier to cover their head, he said canopy. Works for me...but what is it called. Somehow canopy still seems wrong...
Confession: Parker has a new found love of cupcakes (minus icing) and oranges (including the peel). I gave him both for my own amusement, a parenting practice I seem to have developed. This is what happens when you are home alone with a child for the better part of an afternoon. They become a sort of guinea pig.
Confession: I hate and I mean HATE changing the sheets in Pman's crib. It fills me with an irrational rage that can only be equaled by a pregnant woman who is kept waiting at the Babies R Us. (see previous entry- about this time last year). When I am changing the sheets in his crib I force Josh to take Parker out of the room because a lot of language is flying about and I really do not need his first word to be anything X-rated.
Confession: I have listened to the CD so much that Parker now turns his head around in his rear facing carseat so that he can give me a look that says, "Really mom? Again?" Honestly though, the new cd The Block is pretty good. Although, when I played pieces of the best parts for Josh, he replied, "Nikki. This isn't even funny. It's not even so bad it's funny. It's just SO bad." Despite my desperate encouraging and futile attempts to convince him otherwise, Josh is not/never will be a fan. Sorry guys, I tried.
Confession: On Saturday, 2 days after the concert, I downloaded some...well maybe not some. The word some implies a small number whereas I currently have 10 NKOTB songs on my ipod, so more than some. After the songs were safely and securely on my ipod, I told Josh I needed to go workout. It was 4:15 meaning I got to the gym at 4:30 and it closes at 5:00. I didn't care. I NEEDED to hear these songs. Please understand this is a need.
While at the gym Parker, who is the intended focus for this blog, pulls himself up on, well anything. Or anyone I guess. It seems he tried to pull himself up on a little boy at the gym named Hunter, who is probably six months to a year old than Parker. These boys have a love hate relationship. When Pfunk was a wee-funk and went to the gym in the carrier, Hunter used to lift the canopy thing* and sweetly touch Parker's fuzzy hair and then pull the canopy thing back down. It was very cute.
About a week ago when we got to the gym, I sat Parker down and Hunter came over and patted Parker's head sweetly and then started grabbing his face. Parker sat there with this "What the hell..." look on his face. I just said, "Oh no Hunter, be nice to Parker." Hunter stopped and they were back to being buddies.
A day or so later I came into the gym after a great workout (with NKOTB) and was getting my little monkey ready to leave. Then I realized one of the day care girls was talking to Hunter's mom and saying that he had a good day, but that he kicked someone. My ears perked up and I asked, "Are you talking about Parker?" and the day care girl replied, "Yeh, but it was no big thing and Parker did not even cry."
Nice.
She is NOT someone I would ask to babysit Pman for money.
P.S. I did tell her supervisor that while I realize this sort of thing happens, I also expect to be told when my son gets kicked.
*I'm not really sure if canopy thing is right, but when I asked Josh what that thing is called that you pull up on the baby carrier to cover their head, he said canopy. Works for me...but what is it called. Somehow canopy still seems wrong...
Confession: Parker has a new found love of cupcakes (minus icing) and oranges (including the peel). I gave him both for my own amusement, a parenting practice I seem to have developed. This is what happens when you are home alone with a child for the better part of an afternoon. They become a sort of guinea pig.
Confession: I hate and I mean HATE changing the sheets in Pman's crib. It fills me with an irrational rage that can only be equaled by a pregnant woman who is kept waiting at the Babies R Us. (see previous entry- about this time last year). When I am changing the sheets in his crib I force Josh to take Parker out of the room because a lot of language is flying about and I really do not need his first word to be anything X-rated.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Evidence I Am Old
To start, I promised an updated picture of Parker in my last post. So here it is:
I mean really, too cute!
Now on to other things mentioned in the previous post. You know what I'm talking about. The New Kids on the Block (NKOTB) concert.
When these, now men, were actually kids I was about 10. Like every other girl of that age, was IN LOVE with them all. (Minus Danny because any girl from that era knows, Danny looked like a monkey. I mean a real monkey, not a cute Parker monkey.) This was an intense, real love that could only be understood by females who experienced Beatlemania.
The story really begins back in November of 2008, actually now that I think about it, the story truly begins when I was pregnant. One day I was at work when I got an email from one of the bestest of friends, Tina. She sent out an email to our friends Jenn and Aarti as well as. Tina informed us of an upcoming November NKOTB concert and was asking us to all indulge in this guilty (now VERY guilty) pleasure and purchase tickets to this concert.
Sadly, I declined because I was pregnant at the time of purchase and was not sure I would be able to attend the November concert. Looking back now, I SO could have gone. Pman was totally on formula at that point. But there you have it.
Aarti declined as well. Leaving Jenn and Tina to venture back into the world of NKOTB by themselves.
Note: I am writing so formally now, because as the story continues you are going to see a side of me that is a lot less formal and a lot more squealy school girl.
Moving on.
Preconcert they played it all Too Cool for School style to the extent that when a NKOTB song came on at the bar and the other ladies screamed and freaked out, Jenn and Tina mocked them. They now say that they even looked at each other and said, "We are so not going to do that."
Well, the inevitable happened and Jenn and Tina did scream and dance at the concert in November. Thus kicking off the obsession. The day after the concert they both (at work) stalked NKOTB via You Tube videos.
Flash to sometime in January-ish. We found out that the Kids were going to be in Baltimore. Jenn and Tina COULD NOT miss it. I was sucked in by their enthusiasm and told Jenn to put me down for a ticket. Aarti once again ducked reliving the school girl obsession because she just had a baby and had new mommy things to do. I have to say, I was a bit scared by Jenn and Tina's overwhelming energy regarding the concert. For about a month before The Event, I would get emails from one or both of them counting down the days (and yes eventually hours) until the concert. They would send me You Tube clips of concerts past. Any time I spoke to either one of these ladies the concert was referenced in one way or another.
It was my turn to play Too Cool for School and their turn to scream in high pitched tones at the mere mention of anything related to Jordan Knight or Donnie Walbergh (spelling?). One of these ladies was/is so into on Jordan, that her husband has a very real fear that she may run off with him, given the chance.
On the night of March 19 I had a sitter from the day care at the gym come over and watch Pman for the hour or so of cross over time from when I needed to leave and before Josh got home. This is the first time we have left a non-family member alone with Pmoney in our house. I was scared, but he knows her and seems to like her and it was only going to be for an hour or so. When it was all said and done everything- sitterwise went well minus one incident. Apparently this nice girl put his diaper on backwards. But he was still alive and not screaming his head off when Josh got home. No worries...
The night of the concert we planned to eat dinner at Aarti's house, which is located close to the arena. On my way there I went to Starbucks to make sure I was all caffined-up (which is odd because I drank wine at Aarti's and beer ar the concert, whatev). The nice artsy kid with dark rimmed glasses and shaggy jet black dyed hair made me the wrong drink. When I told him of the mistake we had the following conversation.:
Artsy kid: Oops, my bad. Do you want to give this one to a friend?
Me: Oh I would, but I'm driving to Baltimore and I doubt it will still be warm when I get there.
AK: Oh! What are you going to B'more for?
Me: I'm afraid to tell you because I think you will loose respect for me. (I said this and still I'm not sure how much respect he had for me in the first place...curious)
AK: Where are you going?
(I have to say, I wish I had thought quick enough to say something like pole dancing or stripping. Instead I said...)
Me: Um the New Kids on the Block concert.
AK: Oh. You were right.
He then grabbed the incorrect drink away from my reach handed me the correct drink and walked away.
After my- what I now refer to as the Starbucks incident- I made my way to Aarti's. We ate dinner, drank some wine, hung out with her new baby and then a squealing Jen, a giddy Tina and I got into a taxi and headed to the concert. Jenn works for Comcast and has some great connections so we had amazing seats. We were maybe 20 feet from the stage. If Joey McIntyre's (my favorite) zipper was down I would have been able to see it. And if it had been down, I could not be held responsible for my actions. Luckily for everyone involved the zipper stayed up.
At one point they ran past us and while I only touched the shoulder of the dreaded (as in he had dreadlocks) bodyguard, I was close enough to my crush that if I were either a little drunker or just plain crazy, I could have fairly easily thrown myself at him successfully. I have been told that at this portion of the concert a girl across the aisle from me was taking video of the New Kids running by. I am on that video. How do I know this? It's posted on You Tube.
The whole night was a blur in the way prom or your wedding or some other memorable unrepeatable event is. I know I had an amazing time. Throughout the days that followed, bits and pieces of the amazingness flash through my head like snapshots. I was screaming, dancing, singing and generally swooning over these guys. I kept stretching my arms into the arm and doing spirit fingers and I was never even a cheerleader. At some point in my fits of excitment and sheer joy I dropped my camera. Frankly, I'm not sure exactly when this happened. But I did drop it shattering the display screen. I ended up having to buy a new one on Saturday. After the concert we kind of attempted to make it a mission to meet the guys. I even chatted up a toothless lad named Brian who worked at the arena, but he was no help.
I know I want...no NEED to do see them again.
I know you are judging me, but I also know that if you went, whether you were a fan or not way back when, you would have a great time at this concert. They put on a great show and I mean the crowd is made up of 30 year old slightly intoxicated women trying to capture and enjoy a piece of their youth. We are all on the same page. We all love NKOTB and only those of us who have been to the concert, understand the obsession. And yes, you will become OBSESSED with these guys and their music postconcert. Embrace it.
I mean really, too cute!
Now on to other things mentioned in the previous post. You know what I'm talking about. The New Kids on the Block (NKOTB) concert.
When these, now men, were actually kids I was about 10. Like every other girl of that age, was IN LOVE with them all. (Minus Danny because any girl from that era knows, Danny looked like a monkey. I mean a real monkey, not a cute Parker monkey.) This was an intense, real love that could only be understood by females who experienced Beatlemania.
The story really begins back in November of 2008, actually now that I think about it, the story truly begins when I was pregnant. One day I was at work when I got an email from one of the bestest of friends, Tina. She sent out an email to our friends Jenn and Aarti as well as. Tina informed us of an upcoming November NKOTB concert and was asking us to all indulge in this guilty (now VERY guilty) pleasure and purchase tickets to this concert.
Sadly, I declined because I was pregnant at the time of purchase and was not sure I would be able to attend the November concert. Looking back now, I SO could have gone. Pman was totally on formula at that point. But there you have it.
Aarti declined as well. Leaving Jenn and Tina to venture back into the world of NKOTB by themselves.
Note: I am writing so formally now, because as the story continues you are going to see a side of me that is a lot less formal and a lot more squealy school girl.
Moving on.
Preconcert they played it all Too Cool for School style to the extent that when a NKOTB song came on at the bar and the other ladies screamed and freaked out, Jenn and Tina mocked them. They now say that they even looked at each other and said, "We are so not going to do that."
Well, the inevitable happened and Jenn and Tina did scream and dance at the concert in November. Thus kicking off the obsession. The day after the concert they both (at work) stalked NKOTB via You Tube videos.
Flash to sometime in January-ish. We found out that the Kids were going to be in Baltimore. Jenn and Tina COULD NOT miss it. I was sucked in by their enthusiasm and told Jenn to put me down for a ticket. Aarti once again ducked reliving the school girl obsession because she just had a baby and had new mommy things to do. I have to say, I was a bit scared by Jenn and Tina's overwhelming energy regarding the concert. For about a month before The Event, I would get emails from one or both of them counting down the days (and yes eventually hours) until the concert. They would send me You Tube clips of concerts past. Any time I spoke to either one of these ladies the concert was referenced in one way or another.
It was my turn to play Too Cool for School and their turn to scream in high pitched tones at the mere mention of anything related to Jordan Knight or Donnie Walbergh (spelling?). One of these ladies was/is so into on Jordan, that her husband has a very real fear that she may run off with him, given the chance.
On the night of March 19 I had a sitter from the day care at the gym come over and watch Pman for the hour or so of cross over time from when I needed to leave and before Josh got home. This is the first time we have left a non-family member alone with Pmoney in our house. I was scared, but he knows her and seems to like her and it was only going to be for an hour or so. When it was all said and done everything- sitterwise went well minus one incident. Apparently this nice girl put his diaper on backwards. But he was still alive and not screaming his head off when Josh got home. No worries...
The night of the concert we planned to eat dinner at Aarti's house, which is located close to the arena. On my way there I went to Starbucks to make sure I was all caffined-up (which is odd because I drank wine at Aarti's and beer ar the concert, whatev). The nice artsy kid with dark rimmed glasses and shaggy jet black dyed hair made me the wrong drink. When I told him of the mistake we had the following conversation.:
Artsy kid: Oops, my bad. Do you want to give this one to a friend?
Me: Oh I would, but I'm driving to Baltimore and I doubt it will still be warm when I get there.
AK: Oh! What are you going to B'more for?
Me: I'm afraid to tell you because I think you will loose respect for me. (I said this and still I'm not sure how much respect he had for me in the first place...curious)
AK: Where are you going?
(I have to say, I wish I had thought quick enough to say something like pole dancing or stripping. Instead I said...)
Me: Um the New Kids on the Block concert.
AK: Oh. You were right.
He then grabbed the incorrect drink away from my reach handed me the correct drink and walked away.
After my- what I now refer to as the Starbucks incident- I made my way to Aarti's. We ate dinner, drank some wine, hung out with her new baby and then a squealing Jen, a giddy Tina and I got into a taxi and headed to the concert. Jenn works for Comcast and has some great connections so we had amazing seats. We were maybe 20 feet from the stage. If Joey McIntyre's (my favorite) zipper was down I would have been able to see it. And if it had been down, I could not be held responsible for my actions. Luckily for everyone involved the zipper stayed up.
At one point they ran past us and while I only touched the shoulder of the dreaded (as in he had dreadlocks) bodyguard, I was close enough to my crush that if I were either a little drunker or just plain crazy, I could have fairly easily thrown myself at him successfully. I have been told that at this portion of the concert a girl across the aisle from me was taking video of the New Kids running by. I am on that video. How do I know this? It's posted on You Tube.
The whole night was a blur in the way prom or your wedding or some other memorable unrepeatable event is. I know I had an amazing time. Throughout the days that followed, bits and pieces of the amazingness flash through my head like snapshots. I was screaming, dancing, singing and generally swooning over these guys. I kept stretching my arms into the arm and doing spirit fingers and I was never even a cheerleader. At some point in my fits of excitment and sheer joy I dropped my camera. Frankly, I'm not sure exactly when this happened. But I did drop it shattering the display screen. I ended up having to buy a new one on Saturday. After the concert we kind of attempted to make it a mission to meet the guys. I even chatted up a toothless lad named Brian who worked at the arena, but he was no help.
I know I want...no NEED to do see them again.
I know you are judging me, but I also know that if you went, whether you were a fan or not way back when, you would have a great time at this concert. They put on a great show and I mean the crowd is made up of 30 year old slightly intoxicated women trying to capture and enjoy a piece of their youth. We are all on the same page. We all love NKOTB and only those of us who have been to the concert, understand the obsession. And yes, you will become OBSESSED with these guys and their music postconcert. Embrace it.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thank God for Hard Heads...
It was bound to happen.
And really, I'm ok with it. Really I am.
When it is all said and done, everyone is fine, save for a small bump.
Confession: Parker fell off the bed today.
Onto the hardwood floor.
Head first.
Here's how it went down. We were in the master bedroom on the king sized bed. Parker, who has started doing a version of crawling, was flopping about in the middle of the bed. I was right there. I stood up, still looking right at him and in one flowing fluid motion he rolled over to a crawlish position and boom, he was off.
I was right there. I just could not grab him quick enough. In the past I have been able to grab him and prevent the fall. Every time I did this, I said a little prayer that when he does actually fall, it is not that bad. I mean we all knew he was going to fall eventually, despite my best efforts.
When he made contact with the unforgiving hardwood floors he did the thing all mom's dread. He laid for a second or two, motionless, noiseless on the ground. Simultaneous to his fall, I yelled his name several times. I continued to say his name until the screams and tears came, which of course, they did. Both in abundance.
No not from me.
I actually did a good job of holding it together. I have learned that Parker, as most- if not all- babies, feed off their parent's reactions. The first few times I vacuumed after Pfunk was born he made a pre-cry face. So I sang Old MacDonald's Farm (one of his all time favs) and smiled and he just did what I did. Now, the vacuum is of no concern to him, mostly because I do not do it. Similarly, one time he was sitting up in the crib and smacked his head on the side of the it. I know it hurt. I heard it. But I just looked at him, smiled and said, "Oh, I bet that hurt, but you are ok." And for some reason he believed and went on tear-free!
This fall off the bed, however, brought on the waterworks despite anything I said. I probably could have offered him any one of the Victoria's Secret swimsuit models on a silver platter and he still would have wailed his tail off. Understandably so.
I scooped up my little monkey and he cried while burrowing his little head into my chest. He also does this when he is tired. I love when he does this. It makes me appreciate that he will not always be this small, or just wants me to soothe him. He just wanted his mommy to make it better. I just held him, kissed his blonde head and told him he was ok and there was no blood. I did not know about the blood thing really because he would not let me look at him. I'm not sure if I said no blood to comfort me or him. Who am I kidding? I said it to comfort me.
In an attempt to make it better, I turned on the ceiling fan. He loves the ceiling fan. My hunch was correct and the fan quickly became a distraction from the recent trama. When it was all said and done, he has a small bump on the side of his head and the whole episode, fall to fan was about 6 minutes. He's such a trooper!
Pfunk spend the rest of the night flirting with the girls at the gym, eating- his favorite pass time, quasi-crawling and clapping. Yes, he learned how to clap. And he does it -All. The. Time. Although, asking him to clap does nothing. You have to say YEH in a high pitched voice while smiling and clapping and he will mimic you. We have been practicing clapping for a while since they do a lot of it at the reading circle at the library. He just was not into it. In fact, he already has this face that just screams, "Give me a BREAK!" And that is the look I typically got whenever I tried to encourage clapping. At the same time I was also trying to teach him to say more in sign language, which is a very similar motion to clapping. So really, I'm not sure if Parker is clapping or saying more. Curious.
His final trick of the moment is to move in all directions, including forward, in his walker. Previously he only went backwards. He's actually pretty funny about ramming into chairs, the Pack and Play and Abby. Not really Abby, but he would if she didn't run away in fear every time he heads in her direction. He also can reach the DVD player and the cable box. He is currently working on splicing the cable so that he can watch Sprout in his own damn room.
He is truly becoming such a little boy. Always dirty, always smiling- well mostly smiling and always getting into something.
Next week I am going to the New Kids on the Block concert. I'm sure the post to follow will have little to do with Parker and much to do with Jordan, Joey, Johnathan, Donnie and that other guy no one really every liked anyway...Danny was it? Either way, I'm hoping to have such a good time that I make it on to the evening news...
*I will soon post a picture of Pmoney to prove his is a-ok.*
And really, I'm ok with it. Really I am.
When it is all said and done, everyone is fine, save for a small bump.
Confession: Parker fell off the bed today.
Onto the hardwood floor.
Head first.
Here's how it went down
I was right there. I just could not grab him quick enough. In the past I have been able to grab him and prevent the fall. Every time I did this, I said a little prayer that when he does actually fall, it is not that bad. I mean we all knew he was going to fall eventually, despite my best efforts.
When he made contact with the unforgiving hardwood floors he did the thing all mom's dread. He laid for a second or two, motionless, noiseless on the ground. Simultaneous to his fall, I yelled his name several times. I continued to say his name until the screams and tears came, which of course, they did. Both in abundance.
No not from me.
I actually did a good job of holding it together. I have learned that Parker, as most- if not all- babies, feed off their parent's reactions. The first few times I vacuumed after Pfunk was born he made a pre-cry face. So I sang Old MacDonald's Farm (one of his all time favs) and smiled and he just did what I did. Now, the vacuum is of no concern to him, mostly because I do not do it. Similarly, one time he was sitting up in the crib and smacked his head on the side of the it. I know it hurt. I heard it. But I just looked at him, smiled and said, "Oh, I bet that hurt, but you are ok." And for some reason he believed and went on tear-free!
This fall off the bed, however, brought on the waterworks despite anything I said. I probably could have offered him any one of the Victoria's Secret swimsuit models on a silver platter and he still would have wailed his tail off. Understandably so.
I scooped up my little monkey and he cried while burrowing his little head into my chest. He also does this when he is tired. I love when he does this. It makes me appreciate that he will not always be this small, or just wants me to soothe him. He just wanted his mommy to make it better. I just held him, kissed his blonde head and told him he was ok and there was no blood. I did not know about the blood thing really because he would not let me look at him. I'm not sure if I said no blood to comfort me or him. Who am I kidding? I said it to comfort me.
In an attempt to make it better, I turned on the ceiling fan. He loves the ceiling fan. My hunch was correct and the fan quickly became a distraction from the recent trama. When it was all said and done, he has a small bump on the side of his head and the whole episode, fall to fan was about 6 minutes. He's such a trooper!
Pfunk spend the rest of the night flirting with the girls at the gym, eating- his favorite pass time, quasi-crawling and clapping. Yes, he learned how to clap. And he does it -All. The. Time. Although, asking him to clap does nothing. You have to say YEH in a high pitched voice while smiling and clapping and he will mimic you. We have been practicing clapping for a while since they do a lot of it at the reading circle at the library. He just was not into it. In fact, he already has this face that just screams, "Give me a BREAK!" And that is the look I typically got whenever I tried to encourage clapping. At the same time I was also trying to teach him to say more in sign language, which is a very similar motion to clapping. So really, I'm not sure if Parker is clapping or saying more. Curious.
His final trick of the moment is to move in all directions, including forward, in his walker. Previously he only went backwards. He's actually pretty funny about ramming into chairs, the Pack and Play and Abby. Not really Abby, but he would if she didn't run away in fear every time he heads in her direction. He also can reach the DVD player and the cable box. He is currently working on splicing the cable so that he can watch Sprout in his own damn room.
He is truly becoming such a little boy. Always dirty, always smiling- well mostly smiling and always getting into something.
Next week I am going to the New Kids on the Block concert. I'm sure the post to follow will have little to do with Parker and much to do with Jordan, Joey, Johnathan, Donnie and that other guy no one really every liked anyway...Danny was it? Either way, I'm hoping to have such a good time that I make it on to the evening news...
*I will soon post a picture of Pmoney to prove his is a-ok.*
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Couch Potato
With the recent weather (read: snow) and still recovering from colds the Phillips family has logged in some marathon couch riding time. Mainly we watch Sprout. If you do not know what Sprout is, thank your lucky stars and vow to never succumb to the hypnotic sing-alongs and cheery birthday shout-outs.
It is too late for me. I am a victim of Sprout. And Parker? He is a Sproutlette.
If you are still reading and not clear on this Sprout thing, it is a network for youngsters up to preschool age. They air shows such as *Sesame Street, *Bob the Builder, *Fifi and the Flowertots, *Rory the Racing Car, *Calliou, Barney, Bounce, Angelina Ballerina HELP I can't stop naming shows!!!
The * indicates that I know ALL the words to the theme songs of these shows. I'm not saying I dowloaded them to my ipod, but that may or may not be directly related to the fact that I could not find them on itunes during my brief (read: extensive) search.
I have to say, I like a majority of the shows on this network. With the exception of Barney. I have a deeply ingrained hatred for Barney. I'm not sure where this hatred comes from and I'm not sure I'm up for exploring it. All I know is I do not support this Barney empire and feel he must be stopped! Who's with me!? There is just something about those damn kids and their sever, profound inability to act that fills me with rage.
The shows on Sprout are generally hosted by a real person and a hand puppet. On the weekdays the shows are "aired" out of the Sunshine Barn, on the weekends, out of the Sprout Scout Lookout. I'm not making this up.
Chica, the weekday puppet chicken, and her sidekick of the week, either Kelly, Kevin or Shawn, tell the viewing public what day it is and sing happy birthday to viewers who send in their homemade birthday cards. They seem to rotate on a weekly schedule. Meaning, Kelly was on a few weeks ago and will be on again next week. All three of these people are in their 20's I would say, maybe even late 20's. They all seem like nice people, although Shawn is a bit ify. Kelly, who regularly sports pigtails, and Kevin, an Asian gentleman who wears bright shirts with fruits on them, get really into everything they do in the Sunshine Barn. They dance, they sing and are generally silly. I think they may be high. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with this. I just hope they either get paid a lot, which I doubt, or they at least have access to the good stuff.
On weekends, the Sprout Scout Lookout is hosted by Miles, a black man in his 20, with dreads. This poor man even has to ride around in a cardboard box car with his pink dog puppet, Banjo. Miles and Banjo are even part of a band. Poor Miles. Where did you go wrong? Is this some sort of parole punishment? An outreach program perhaps? What do your friends say? Oh the verbal beating you must take from them on a daily basis.
There is also a random girl, who I sometimes thinks looks like a bad version of me. I cannot think of her name, but she plays the guitar and I really cannot figure out where she fits into the mix. It's like the Sprout exec's were like, "Um, there's this sad girl, with a guitar? Have you seen her outside the building? Yeah, well, maybe if we allow her to make up a few somewhat scary songs about going to the doctor and the importance of wearing shoes, she will perk up a bit and leave us alone." I really have seen no rhyme or reason as to when this girl appears on the Sprout channel. I find her scary and annoying, but still not as bad as Barney.
Finally, I have noticed something about the commercials on this channel. They are either geared toward children or mommies. However, one commercial in particular has me a bit puzzled as I watch it and observe Parker's reaction. Pmoney's reaction is the puzzling part, not the commercial itself. I, of course, am referencing the Bare Minerals commercial.
This advertisement has bunch of up close shots of beautiful fresh faced ladies. It puts Prock in such a trance, I fear he make choke if it comes on when he is eating. At the end there is a pretty girl in beyond perfect lighting with light brown hair, greenish blue eyes and gleaming glowing white teeth. She is saying some nonsense about how Bare Minerals changed her life. At this point, Parker starts to giggle.
I'm not sure if he like the girl or the makeup. I love him either way, but middle school will be very tough if he prefers the makeup.
Clearly it has been a slow week. Josh caught what Pfunk and I had, rendering him useless for a few days. Has anyone noticed that when guys get colds, even when they catch it from you, it is worse than anything you could imagine. "Childbirth? Don't make me laugh, childbirth does not compare to the congestion I got going on in my sinus cavities!"
I did banish him to the guest room for a few nights. The cold was no childbirth, but I sure as hell don't want it again!
It is too late for me. I am a victim of Sprout. And Parker? He is a Sproutlette.
If you are still reading and not clear on this Sprout thing, it is a network for youngsters up to preschool age. They air shows such as *Sesame Street, *Bob the Builder, *Fifi and the Flowertots, *Rory the Racing Car, *Calliou, Barney, Bounce, Angelina Ballerina HELP I can't stop naming shows!!!
The * indicates that I know ALL the words to the theme songs of these shows. I'm not saying I dowloaded them to my ipod, but that may or may not be directly related to the fact that I could not find them on itunes during my brief (read: extensive) search.
I have to say, I like a majority of the shows on this network. With the exception of Barney. I have a deeply ingrained hatred for Barney. I'm not sure where this hatred comes from and I'm not sure I'm up for exploring it. All I know is I do not support this Barney empire and feel he must be stopped! Who's with me!? There is just something about those damn kids and their sever, profound inability to act that fills me with rage.
The shows on Sprout are generally hosted by a real person and a hand puppet. On the weekdays the shows are "aired" out of the Sunshine Barn, on the weekends, out of the Sprout Scout Lookout. I'm not making this up.
Chica, the weekday puppet chicken, and her sidekick of the week, either Kelly, Kevin or Shawn, tell the viewing public what day it is and sing happy birthday to viewers who send in their homemade birthday cards. They seem to rotate on a weekly schedule. Meaning, Kelly was on a few weeks ago and will be on again next week. All three of these people are in their 20's I would say, maybe even late 20's. They all seem like nice people, although Shawn is a bit ify. Kelly, who regularly sports pigtails, and Kevin, an Asian gentleman who wears bright shirts with fruits on them, get really into everything they do in the Sunshine Barn. They dance, they sing and are generally silly. I think they may be high. I'm not saying there is anything wrong with this. I just hope they either get paid a lot, which I doubt, or they at least have access to the good stuff.
On weekends, the Sprout Scout Lookout is hosted by Miles, a black man in his 20, with dreads. This poor man even has to ride around in a cardboard box car with his pink dog puppet, Banjo. Miles and Banjo are even part of a band. Poor Miles. Where did you go wrong? Is this some sort of parole punishment? An outreach program perhaps? What do your friends say? Oh the verbal beating you must take from them on a daily basis.
There is also a random girl, who I sometimes thinks looks like a bad version of me. I cannot think of her name, but she plays the guitar and I really cannot figure out where she fits into the mix. It's like the Sprout exec's were like, "Um, there's this sad girl, with a guitar? Have you seen her outside the building? Yeah, well, maybe if we allow her to make up a few somewhat scary songs about going to the doctor and the importance of wearing shoes, she will perk up a bit and leave us alone." I really have seen no rhyme or reason as to when this girl appears on the Sprout channel. I find her scary and annoying, but still not as bad as Barney.
Finally, I have noticed something about the commercials on this channel. They are either geared toward children or mommies. However, one commercial in particular has me a bit puzzled as I watch it and observe Parker's reaction. Pmoney's reaction is the puzzling part, not the commercial itself. I, of course, am referencing the Bare Minerals commercial.
This advertisement has bunch of up close shots of beautiful fresh faced ladies. It puts Prock in such a trance, I fear he make choke if it comes on when he is eating. At the end there is a pretty girl in beyond perfect lighting with light brown hair, greenish blue eyes and gleaming glowing white teeth. She is saying some nonsense about how Bare Minerals changed her life. At this point, Parker starts to giggle.
I'm not sure if he like the girl or the makeup. I love him either way, but middle school will be very tough if he prefers the makeup.
Clearly it has been a slow week. Josh caught what Pfunk and I had, rendering him useless for a few days. Has anyone noticed that when guys get colds, even when they catch it from you, it is worse than anything you could imagine. "Childbirth? Don't make me laugh, childbirth does not compare to the congestion I got going on in my sinus cavities!"
I did banish him to the guest room for a few nights. The cold was no childbirth, but I sure as hell don't want it again!
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